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| Things I wish someone had told me when I was a teenager. |
Dear teenage self,
I understand that writing you a letter, hoping it could be delivered to you back in time, and making sure you read it are nonsensical, at all. But I am still writing it anyway because there is so much I want to tell you. There is just so much thing I wish you could understand at your age, especially when you are thirteen years old until you reach eighteen. So yeah, here is a letter full of much-needed advice though I know it is impossible for you to read. But maybe this letter can also speak to any teenagers out there who are confused and lost, just like you, because sometimes, it is not easy being a teenager, right?
Dear Nikita,
You do not have to set up an account on every social media just because you are afraid to be left behind, mainly you do not want to miss the latest school gossip, duh. I know the internet will be a new big thing in your time, but please, you actually are not ready for that. You post and share a lot without thinking twice. You spend a lot of time on Friendster, Myspace, Facebook, Twitter, Plurk, Multiply, Blogger, Tumblr, Formspring, Flickr, Polyvore, Yahoo Messenger, Msn. See? How many is that? Oh, and now you are giving your older self a hard time deleting your posts and account. Luckily, some of them are no longer available.
Stop trying to fit in and just be yourself. I understand the teenage years are all about self-discovery. But if your mom, out of nowhere, says, "kamu pernah loh tiba - tiba berubah jadi anak yang Mamah sama Papah nggak kenal waktu kelas tujuh. Sampai Mamah bingung mesti ngadepin kamu gimana," then maybe you discover a wrong self, you rebel.
Being vulnerable scares you, I know. But you can not brush off your feeling and act like everything is fine while actually, it is not. Acknowledge it, talk about it. You think that when you stop talking and stay quiet, those scary feelings and unwanted emotions will be stopped. Darling, they will not. It just makes you seem a cold and heartless person.
Learn to have empathy, you are lacking it.
I understand that writing you a letter, hoping it could be delivered to you back in time, and making sure you read it are nonsensical, at all. But I am still writing it anyway because there is so much I want to tell you. There is just so much thing I wish you could understand at your age, especially when you are thirteen years old until you reach eighteen. So yeah, here is a letter full of much-needed advice though I know it is impossible for you to read. But maybe this letter can also speak to any teenagers out there who are confused and lost, just like you, because sometimes, it is not easy being a teenager, right?
Dear Nikita,
You do not have to set up an account on every social media just because you are afraid to be left behind, mainly you do not want to miss the latest school gossip, duh. I know the internet will be a new big thing in your time, but please, you actually are not ready for that. You post and share a lot without thinking twice. You spend a lot of time on Friendster, Myspace, Facebook, Twitter, Plurk, Multiply, Blogger, Tumblr, Formspring, Flickr, Polyvore, Yahoo Messenger, Msn. See? How many is that? Oh, and now you are giving your older self a hard time deleting your posts and account. Luckily, some of them are no longer available.
Stop trying to fit in and just be yourself. I understand the teenage years are all about self-discovery. But if your mom, out of nowhere, says, "kamu pernah loh tiba - tiba berubah jadi anak yang Mamah sama Papah nggak kenal waktu kelas tujuh. Sampai Mamah bingung mesti ngadepin kamu gimana," then maybe you discover a wrong self, you rebel.
Keep doing what you love, your hobbies, and do not stop. Immerse yourself in things you are interested with. Here I am going to tell you: answering "what is your hobby?" when you are older is not easy like when you are a teenager. You need to think long and hard because you are not sure whether those hobbies are still your hobbies or not since it has been a long time you do not spare time for it. So please, do not stop reading, writing, drawing, painting, taking pictures, making DIY things, swimming, basically anything you love to do. Oh, always remember that your dad fully supports you and he (also me! your older self) would be happy if you join some classes in music/vocal.
I know you can be so awkward in front of the camera and you prefer to be the one behind the lens, but you should take a lot of pictures (not a selfie) of yourself in high school. You are giving me a hard time in finding a proper picture of you. Believe me, you have nice skin ever comparing to your older self. So enjoy it while it lasts cause cystic acne sucks, darling. Also, you do not need to edit your photos in camera 360 with magic skin or light color effects, please do not do that.
You will have one moment when you are coming back home crying because of your friend copies your homework but you are the one who is getting blamed for. Since then, you hate being copied by others because you want to be different. You love to be unique and original. Keep doing that, girl!
You will always be that one person who believes in the law of attraction. So dream high and keep a positive attitude on it. Once you really want something, the whole universe will conspire to make it happen.
Stay competitive and ambitious. That what keeps you alive.
Since you were a kid, you knew what you want and what you do not really want. As you get older, you are becoming a strong headed and strongly opinionated person which causes a countless and endless debate with your mom. Oftentimes you have a different opinion with her. But there will be time, you must listen to her so you will not blame yourself for the rest of your life. However, I am still proud of you, because you still do well anyway.
Since you were a kid, you knew what you want and what you do not really want. As you get older, you are becoming a strong headed and strongly opinionated person which causes a countless and endless debate with your mom. Oftentimes you have a different opinion with her. But there will be time, you must listen to her so you will not blame yourself for the rest of your life. However, I am still proud of you, because you still do well anyway.
Being vulnerable scares you, I know. But you can not brush off your feeling and act like everything is fine while actually, it is not. Acknowledge it, talk about it. You think that when you stop talking and stay quiet, those scary feelings and unwanted emotions will be stopped. Darling, they will not. It just makes you seem a cold and heartless person.
Learn to have empathy, you are lacking it.
People say teenage years are all about friendship, it is true. Sadly, not all of your friends will be around you forever. Some will, some will not. So treasure your friends and your time with them. Keep in your mind that it is okay to grow apart with your friends and lose them cause that always happens. Even the one you thought you will never lose, you still lose. But along the way, you will find friends whom you keep dearly and make them your forever person.
Stop the meaningless gossips, fights, and bullies. You will not be proud of it, believe me.
Your teacher at LIA, Mom Lily, ever said, "nothing too much about love." But you, please, do not love someone too much. Because she could be wrong and you have a tendency of allowing yourself to dwell in sadness for too long every time you get your heart broken.
Your teacher at LIA, Mom Lily, ever said, "nothing too much about love." But you, please, do not love someone too much. Because she could be wrong and you have a tendency of allowing yourself to dwell in sadness for too long every time you get your heart broken.
Do not push people away who love you and stop building the walls. You think you are very good at it, while actually, you are not. In the end, you are the one who gets hurt and ended up thinking, "is he/she okay?".
If you think time will heal all the wounds, it does not. But it gets better along the way. Promise me that you will turn every wound and sadness into an art form. I swear that though the pain may linger and hurt, you still can look back and talk about that with peals of laughter except when it includes the death of your loved one.
Take care of your body, mind, and spirit. In short, love yourself. Cut out the junk food and stop craving for spicy foods! I know how hard it is not to hang out with your friends in McD (SMP) or KFC (SMA) or not to eat Ayam Penyet WSG in Margonda, but you must cut it out. And in terms of faith, please do not give up on it.
Take care of your body, mind, and spirit. In short, love yourself. Cut out the junk food and stop craving for spicy foods! I know how hard it is not to hang out with your friends in McD (SMP) or KFC (SMA) or not to eat Ayam Penyet WSG in Margonda, but you must cut it out. And in terms of faith, please do not give up on it.
Finally, my dear teenage self,
Never take your parents for granted, especially your dad. Basically, do not take everyone for granted. I will never get bored to tell you that you will not have anyone forever, including your dad. You think he will always be there supporting you, helping you with your math problems, being strict with you, driving you anywhere you go, asking you if you are okay every time you are in a bad mood, cheering you up–he will not. So my advice to you my dear, spend a lot of time with him talking. Ask a lot about life, about his opinion towards anything, about his life story, about relationship, about education, about career, essentially, ask him how to survive in this world since he has a lot of wisdom.
Oh one more thing, you have the brightest smile ever in your teenage years. Please always keep that smile.
My dear, one day you will know how far you will go.
Love,
NM.
